Let me tell you, life can get very lonely when you don’t have any family around. I moved from the United States to Australia when I was 21, and I didn’t get married until 11 years later. My sister lived here for one year, but for 10 years I lived in a foreign country with no family. However, during that time, some key people demonstrated to me that the family has pivotal potential in the work of the gospel.
We also see this in the book of Ruth. Ruth takes place in two countries, Israel and its neighbour, Moab.
Moab has a distasteful origin story—a sexually immoral relationship between Lot and one of his daughters. From there, Moab’s history proceeded along an unfortunate trajectory—continual conflicts with the nations around it, particularly Israel, and following a god who accepted human sacrifice among other things (2 Kings 3).
This is where Ruth comes from.
Israel, on the other hand, was in a toxic cycle, as we know from the book of Judges: the people rebel against God and fall into sin and evil; God then withdraws His protection from them, and they experience the natural consequences of that kind of living. They then repent and call out to God, who responds by raising a ruler to save them. The people then do good for a while but drift back into rebellion and idolatry. The same thing happens over and over again. The final verse in the book of Judges says, “In those days there was no king in Israel; everyone did what was right in his own eyes” (21:25).
The book of Ruth introduces a family in Israel who had nothing to eat due to a famine. The people had again rebelled against God and were suffering because of their actions. In desperation for food, Naomi, her husband Elimelek, and their sons Mahlon and Chilion, journeyed about 100 kilometres on foot to Moab. Soon after they arrived, Elimelek died. Suddenly, Naomi was left as a widow to care for her two sons, when it was very difficult for a woman to provide. She had no support or security and was in a country where people followed different gods and lived a different lifestyle.
Eventually, her two sons married women there: Orpah and Ruth. The family continued to live in Moab for about 10 years before Naomi’s two sons also died. Naomi went from one difficult situation to the next. Yet in everything, she stayed faithful and held onto Yahweh, her God.
Later, she heard that God had brought bread into her hometown, and she decided to return to her people. Naomi, Orpah and Ruth began on their way to Israel. Along the route, Naomi turned to them and demanded they part ways. In this cultural context, the daughters were bound to their mother-in-law. Naomi knew it was her right that they stay and provide for her, but she was getting old. She knew it would be difficult for them to return to Israel as single women. So, she insisted they break their bond and the women return to their country and find new husbands and families.
Orpah and Ruth started to weep and responded, “We will return with you” (1:10). Again, Naomi demanded they go back. Eventually, Orpah yielded, kissed Naomi goodbye and went on her way. Ruth clung to Naomi. She knew their future would be difficult, but she remained loyal.
Something about Naomi, her family and their walk with the God of Israel must have been so compelling to Ruth that she could not part ways with Naomi. Ruth left her entire world behind knowing it would involve great hardship. Yet it was through their witness as individuals and as a family, that Ruth came to see the truth and love of God. No self-preservation was worth giving up for Naomi and she said, “Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried” (1:16-18).
Genesis 1:27 says God created humanity to reflect His likeness. Not just His physical form, but His likeness of other-centred love. The first words He gave to man and woman together were “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it” (1:28). In other words, have a family. Before anything was broken on Earth, God blessed and ordained the family to be a picture of His love to all who existed.
A few chapters later, we see humans bring evil, suffering and death into the world and walk away from God. Still, He remained faithful and told them He would save them. How? Through the family unit. The people would have offspring, and one of those offspring would be God Himself to save the world from their sins. Every mother hoped her son would be the Messiah who would rescue the Israelites from the mess they got themselves into.
Today we have the assurance of salvation, though we still live in a broken world. Currently, about 33 per cent of Australian marriages and 60 per cent of second marriages end in divorce1. De facto relationships that do not result in marriage are six times more likely to end in separation.2 The flow-on effects of this are huge.
- Children from fatherless homes are four times more likely to be poor and 71 per cent more likely to drop out of school. Boys are more likely to become involved in crime, while girls are more likely to become pregnant as teens.3
- Parental divorce is a huge risk factor for psychological problems in adolescence and adulthood, including low self-esteem, substance use and abuse, adult criminal offending, and depression and anxiety.4
- Individuals of single-parent homes are more than twice as likely to commit suicide.5
- In the US, 63 per cent of youth suicides, 90 per cent of all homeless children, 85 per cent of all children who show behaviour disorders and 85 per cent of youths in prison are from fatherless homes.6 Australia isn’t far behind.
It doesn’t stop there. Individuals who are experiencing loneliness and social isolation or are not inside a loving family unit have a 64 per cent increased risk of developing dementia, and a 50 per cent increased likelihood of premature death (comparable to other high-risk factors on health such as being obese or smoking 15 cigarettes a day).7 Lonely individuals are more prone to depression, sleep disorders, impaired immune function, high blood pressure and heart disease.8
The family is the basic unit of society. States are made up of communities, and communities are made up of families. It is in the family that individuals’ characters are beginning to develop in their most formative stages. If you want to have a real-lasting change in the world, it starts in your own house.
When we look at what God called the family to be, it was not just about flesh-and-blood relatives. God designed the family to extend beyond those walls and bring in those who don’t have family. That’s why Jesus said, “When you put on a luncheon or a banquet, don’t invite your friends, brothers, relatives and rich neighbours. For they will invite you back, and that will be your only reward. Instead, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame and the blind. Then at the resurrection of the righteous, God will reward you for inviting those who could not repay you” (Luke 14:12-14, NLT).
In Australia, I met two guys, Jaimes and Adrian, and their families would invite me into their homes. The first place I went on holiday was Toowoomba, Queensland. You might be thinking, Of all places, why there? It was simply because Jaimes said, “Robby! It’s the holidays! You don’t have anywhere to go. Come stay at our house for the week.” His family welcomed me in, fed me and gave me a bed. A few years later I was sleeping in my car by the beach because I didn’t have a place to live. Adrian’s parents found out and said, “Robby, it’s not happening” and offered me a room. Embarrassed, I tried to decline their offer or at least pay rent. To save my pride they settled on $50, meals included . . . a drop in the ocean.
Their witness was one of the most powerful influences God has had in my life. I’ve listened to great sermons and read many spiritual books, but few things have been as impactful as Christian families like theirs who welcomed me into their homes when I had no family close by.
In Ministry of Healing, EG White says, “The mission of the home extends beyond its own members. The Christian home is to be an object lesson, illustrating the excellence of the true principles of life. Such an illustration will be a power for good in the world.”
In the story of Ruth we see that what God does, He does primarily through His people. You and your family don’t have to have it all together to reflect God’s love to the world. You just have to be walking honestly and truthfully with Him. Even though Naomi experienced great suffering and had doubts, her and her family’s influence gave Ruth enough evidence that she needed to choose God. Ruth’s story is so significant because she became the ancestor of King David, who became the ancestor of King Jesus, who came to save everyone.
God is in the business of bringing the stranger, the destitute, the foreigner and the lonely into His family. His plan of redemption always included the family unit. And He’s calling us out so we may cooperate with Him and invite others in.
The influence of your home can change the community around you and that will ripple out and change society. So, will you harbour heaven in your home? Will you show people the love of Jesus through your family? Will you bring in those outside your walls?
Adapted from: www.youtube.com/watch?v=j3TlXPCiy2o. Full reference list online.
Robby Morgan is the ARISE and outreach coordinator at Kingscliff church, NSW, where he attends with his wife Katie, and their daughter Scout.
