I resign, I said to myself.
Mums like to give the appearance that they have got it all together. But scratch away at the surface a little and you’ll find it’s an illusion.
I felt unloved, taken for granted, unappreciated.
But wait, there’s no resigning from motherhood!
Life as a mum is full of ups and downs. When the kids are young it’s physically exhausting; as they get older it’s emotionally challenging.
But I’ve found that the struggles of bringing up children are not something that mums generally talk about. We’re all supermums right? And our kids are perfect little people, full of goodness and love . . .
On this particular day I was trying to help the children with their homework—never a pleasant task. In the process I was told I had it all wrong; basically I had no idea what I was talking about. Ouch, that hurt! It’s usually something I would take in my stride but the kids’ attitudes really cut deep that day.
Mums like to give the appearance that they have got it all together. But scratch away at the surface a little and you’ll find it’s an illusion. Generally we don’t like to admit our flaws—and especially those of our children. After all if our kids are acting up, or having emotional or other problems, we start feeling guilty—it must be our fault. We begin questioning our mothering skills.
Then there’s the added pressure of trying to live up to society’s expectations of looking good, holding down a career and being able to whip up healthy meals in a flash. And church life also brings with it certain expectations.
I went for a walk later that day and got to thinking about God and His unenviable job of being a Parent to all of humankind. Does He ever feel like resigning? No doubt He regularly feels unloved, taken for granted, unappreciated. But He loves us regardless and unconditionally—forgiving us for how we have treated Him and always willing to welcome us back.
I also thought about the mums who make up a large portion of our church membership and carry out many of the roles in the Church. Do they feel nurtured and supported? Does anybody care? Do we stop to listen and find out how their lives are really going or do we just assume that everything is okay?
For those mums looking for inspiration, Ellen White has these words of wisdom: “The mother’s work often seems to her an unimportant service. It is a work that is rarely appreciated. Others know little of her many cares and burdens . . . She feels that she has accomplished nothing. But it is not so. Heavenly angels watch the care-worn mother, noting the burdens she carries day by day. Her name may not have been heard in the world, but it is written in the Lamb’s book of life (Ministry of Healing).”
Tracey Bridcutt is copyeditor for Adventist Record.